Not perfect as in they have a perfect life—I’m sure nothing like that exists. I mean perfect as in they can always handle the things they are dealt. They can put themselves in situation after situation and always come out on top. You know exactly the type of person I’m talking about. They are are the people who can get good grades, have fun, save the world, and start an organization while still having time for a hobby or two. They are the people who do a million and one things, and always seem to have it all together. And you know, maybe it’s just that—an illusion. Actually, I’m highly convinced it is an illusion. But the fact they pull it off? That’s what impresses me.
Unfortunately though, it does more than impress me—it mocks me. Not the people who are like this (they are far too perfect for such a thing), but the actual fact that there are people like this who exist in the world. School and activities and work and everything is really hard for me, and I wish more than anything that I could just deal with it. I can’t though. I openly stress, I always look as tired as I am, I complain about everything, I’m quite often negative, and I don’t know what to do about it. Really, I feel guilty about it. I wish I could hold myself together like all these perfect people do. I wish I could deal with the few commitments I have, take on the others I often wish I had, and still feel like I was thriving at the end of the day (or at least make it seem that way). I don’t know what it is I’m lacking. Social skills? Intelligence? Motivation? I’m really not sure. Whatever it is though, I really wish I had it.
